When Languages Failed, But Hearts Spoke……

April 10, 2007

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Is there any Language for Hearts??

“Oru malai illam veiyl nerram, Alaghana illai uthir kalam”, the beautiful words going with the hypotinizing tune, seldom leaves us without thinking about a girl. Music ceased, when i picked the phone “hello, i’ll be there tommorow at 10 pm,hmm.. im starting tonight..sure..bye”. With huge amount of zeal and happiness, i grabbed by bag and walked out of my office in the evening. I reached my place to bundle up all my clothes for the journey. I opened my wardrobe,there was a few minutes of silence. Softly i picked a glass article, bought for my brothers marriage, to be held in two days. With high elation, i stepped into the railway station,dreaming about my marriage which probably would happen in next couple of months. My mind didn’t rest and many thoughts were engaging it, unaware of the catastrope waiting for me.

Train randown, quickly i reached my coach and got in. i was leaping over the huge bundles on the way to my seat, which might belong to those, in my coupe. Apparently they were on for a cultural feast, most probably a marriage, I hoped so. The pleasant fragrance of flowers kindled my thoughts which was already dancing to the tunes of wedding bells. I throwed my bag over the berth and climbed over . It was completly dark at that time. But still my eyes didn’t miss that pleasant sight of the silky saree over a creamy skin, when the train moved over the platform. she moved across my coupe, the cruel lights faded away once the train left the platform. i wasn’t bothered, pulled my blanket to veil my face.

Shrill horn of the train, woke me up. my watch showed 7.30. when i got down, saw that red saree again, but this time it was only the saree not the creamy skin. I sat in the side berth near the window. I bought a paper and started browsing it. “our key batsmen let us down”- Dravid;the usual stories, our captain responding to the 95 runs defeat to pakistan. I turned the page, this time it was unsual, i noticed a face starring at me, through the reflection in my watch. i don’t want to disturb things, slowly turned another page, this time i’m blessed to see that beautiful painting, crafted by none other than the almighty. i couldn’t resist myself anymore, turned my face towards her. she immediately turned her face towards the window, bitting her lips, pretending to be casual. The dark pinkish saree, over the same creamy skin, long ear rings dancing over her shoulders, the sharp nose with cute nose ring, blackish eyes under the thin eyebrows, reddish lips and thick hair touching the chairs. Oh! my god, is she a Goddess?? one should be blessed to see heaven in reality . Her cheeks were turning red, as though they gonna burst at any time. She was still bitting her lips to control her smile. “saab kaya … tha” , a voice disturbed me. Back to normal state… “newspaper” i responded, thought he asked “what u doin???”. A big laugh bursted there, latter i learned from my neighbour that he asked me “what u eat??”.. I never felt embarrassed, my eyes refused to move from her. she too laughed, along with everyone, but only i knew the reasons behind it.

“saab hey mera…….”, a guy came from bathroom said. i didn’t get what he said, but i understood, he wanted me to quit the place. I climbed up the berth. I felt as though i was in hell, every second was killing me. I don’t want to miss the glimpse of her, the beautiul art that never could be reproduced by god. He had used all his skills to craft her. Wheres my will power?? whats my sixth sense doing?? self control activities started in me. Umpteen number of questions in my mind. “why should i see her again now, Is that just because she is beautiful? I switched on my i-pod and closed my eyes. Nothing much sensible things were running in my mind but still many thoughts were haunting my mind. This time they were not pleasant but paining.

The train reached the tunnel. The white lights made me to open my eyelids. “with both the legs folded closely,palms tightly pressed over the ears and eyes completly closed, she was there in front of me.Her kiddish fear for the tunnel might be crazy but her gesture was awesome and no adjective to describe the cuteness. I wanted to hug and kiss her atleast a billion times. The cutest seen that i have ever seen, her skin turning red allover her body. I could see her green nerves and dark blood which is almost transparent. At the end of the tunnel she got relaxed still the fear sustained in her face which is almost pink by this time. I also saw the small tear at the conner of her eyes, Which screw up the pain in my heart. Immediately her eyes never hesitated to have a glance on me. My eyes were completly directed towards her, i know she was there only for me. She quickly adjusted her saree and pretended to be casual. Her reddish lips could’nt resist smiling. She started to stare out of the window leaning over the chair.

This time nothing was there in my mind, except to take this doll to my house.I thought she was the gift for me from almighty. My prayers and wishes were answered in her form . I was flying in the sky with the angeles singing around me.I dint want to miss her.

Suddenly things started to get serious. She neither glimpsed nor smiled for the last few hours. I saw some men moving the bundles and buckets closed to the door. My thoughts stalled for a minute.I havent talked to her but she gonna get down in few minutes. My blood corpulses were vigorously hitting the walls of heart. I was completly in loss of words, only thought was to take her with me. But what she was thinking?

She stood up following her parents. I wasted no time to reach her. I saw the tears rolling down from her eyes due to fear, but i dont know the reason for that. ” I like u, I like u a lot….. do you like me??? please tell me… please”- I told her. The only reply was her tears, and she started weeping. She didnt understand what i said, still i stressed her for reply. Her weeping increased with her lips murmuring few words. I couldnt understand what she said but i thought i was mislead by innocent behaviour of this traditional village girl. I felt really embarrassed and moved few steps back. She walked away starring at my eyes, for a second i thought she was expecting something from me. But my brain was smart enough to hold back my thoughts, warning of my misbehavior.

With a heavy heart, regretting for my idiotic thoughts i leaned down. All my zeal and happiness were completely ruined.

NOTE:
The Last words of her ” Tum mujhe bahuth pasand hain! Tum bhi kuch kehna chahthi naa? Kuch Kaho Naa! jalde ! kuch karo naa! ” (“I like u very much! do uve anything to say !tell me ..quick… do something!!!”)

But he didn’t respond …


சுடும் பனிச்சாரல்

February 14, 2007

A Valentine Special

பூவிதழ் மேலே பனித்துளி ஒன்றுக் கண்டேன்
என் ஜென்மம்  முக்தியடைந்ததென எண்ணிக்கொண்டேன்
அச்சம் கொண்டேன்ஆனாலும் எனை மேச்சிக் கண்டேன்
கண்ணீரை மரைத்து சிரிக்க கற்றுக்கொண்டேன்

நென்ஞின் அறைக்குள்ளே  நரம்பின் மெத்தைமேலே
சிவக்கும் உன் கண்ணும் கண்டு
என் இரத்தம் வெட்க்கம் கொள்வதேனோ
பித்தம் கொண்டு என் நென்ஞம் உன்னை
சுற்றும் நேரம் கொன்ஜம் என் ரத்த ஒட்டம் நிர்க்க
வரமாய் உன்னை கேட்ப்பேனோ

புன்னகைக்கும் நேரம் கண்கள் நனைவதேனோ
என்னுள் இருந்தும் விலகி நீ நிற்பதேனோ

கொஞ்சி கொஞ்சி நீ நகைக்கும் நேரம்
நையில் நதி சாரலில் நான் நனைவதேனோ
தள்ளி தள்ளி நான் விலகும் நேரம் என்
கைக்குட்டை கூட கவிதை வடிப்பதேனோ

கடற்கரை நுறையில் காதல் கோட்டை ஒன்றை அமைப்பேனோ
பின்பு கண்ணீர் ஊற்றி அதை கலைப்பேனோ
maru மூச்சு மலரிந்திட யாசகம் கேட்பேனோ மறுத்தால்
மூச்சின் வாசகம் முடிப்பேனோ.

தொட்டு தொட்டு திறக்கும் தேனி போல
பூவே உன்னுள் புதைந்து தொலைவேனோ
அதிலிருந்து நான் மீள்வேனோ
மீன்டாலும் உனை பிரிந்து வாழ்வேனோ!!


Will the Wounds Heal??? (A true love story…)

February 14, 2007

A Valentine Special

A Valentine Special

“Silence Please”, the shrill baritone rung into everyone’s ears. Back to their seats, the usual routine started. The first few benches had their eyes fixed on the black board and the last few towards every other corner of the class room. He was an average student, sitting in the middle row, trying to listen despite the drowsy atmosphere. Something seemed to be disturbing him,ever since the class commenced. At last he decided to turn back, (how he wished he could have avoided!) and did so. What did he see?? The glimpse stayed in his mind. Was he trying to find a conclusion to this issue, or figuring out why it was so attractive??? For some, it’s just a piece of art crafted by a skilled artisan (Mehandi drawn on the foot). Was it really romantic??? What was really running on his mind?? “Can I clean the board?” the Teacher yelled, and he pulled his friends note book to finish the equation. The thought was sporadically haunting him all that day. This was a strange feeling ,the first of its kind and he yearned to see that foot again. The day dawned soon for him, he spent most of the time before the mirror (Is he showing the sign of adolescence?) and stepped into the class room with high zeal.

 

Oh God! What a pity that the first session was lab, everyone had left to the assigned laboratories. He picked his coat and record, and headed towards the lab and remained silent. Why girls make us dumb?? (It’s their style of conquering our thoughts) …still a ray of hope touched his heart, despite the disappointment. Bell rang, everyone rushed out of the lab, quibbling over the lab assistant. He skipped his lunch (a normal trait of men in love) and walked to his bench where a girl was sitting. “Did u finish the 5th experiment?” she asked. No answers from him, he just sat beside her and his curious eyes were directed towards the door steps. “Hey dude! What happened” she asked again, caring for her friend. He turned and saw her; he could feel the soft warmth of his friend. But it wasn’t the usual glance of his eyes; they were filled more with disappointments, fear and pain. She grabbed his hands and said “I am there for you why do you worry?” Those words brought solace to his bleeding heart.

 

The first hour of the second session started. Something was going on in the class, which never seemed to concern him. All his thoughts were concerned about finding the girl. A soft smile blossomed in his face, his lips involuntarily stretched as he saw that foot again in front of him over the Dias. The smile never lasted for long, for the foot he admired belonged to the girl who consoled him few minutes back. She was indeed his close friend. With whom he shares everything. For the first time he felt god was inconsiderate to him. Several questions were raised in his mind. Some meaningful and lot many things meaningless. His heart started to pump fast, what’s happening to him?? Only he knows. His brain is highly loaded with umpteen thoughts. “Can I tell her that I love her?”, “is it fair to love a friend?”, “what if she says no?”, “am I demeaning the friendship??”,”Love or friendship which weighs more??”. Oh! No one in this world can arrive at a convincing conclusion. At this point he needed her presence; did not want to lose her at any cost. Every day when she talked to him, he wanted to tell her “you are my breath, you are my heartbeat, and you are for me for ever”. Never had he opened his mouth. The more she talks, more he listened quite pleased. A smile in pain brings all the wisdom in men.

 

Days rolled on. He had many disagreements with his friends for several reasons. Even he lost few due to his possessiveness towards this girl (is this the consequence of love???).It’s not directly because of her, but if she wasn’t there in his life, then he would have had everyone in his side. He never wanted to showcase his love before his friends. But none in this world is too smart to hide their feelings to perfection.

He became so closely attached to her, even more dependent on her for every thing he did. Depression seemed to follow him; even doctors say heart pains are intolerable. He wasn’t able to put up with it, needed a person to share all his emotions.

 

The next day he reached his friend’s house, “want to talk to you” he didn’t waste any time. Both climbed the staircase heading towards the terrace (Most of the romance starts or ends in terrace. Why??? No answer). The few minutes of silence was broken by his friend “hey man what happened”. With lots of hesitation he opened his mouth. “What do you think about love?” He asked his friend. An immediate smile appeared in his friends face. He threw hands around his shoulders and pulled him closely and asked “who is that lucky girl?” Is it wrong to love a close friend??? Am I disgracing good friendship??? Slowly he murmured. His friend took a piece of paper and gave it to him. This contains the text as follows.

 

“Love is a lovely art, drawn in the heart

We never know when it happens to us

But once it happens, it should be expressed.

Never turn down the proposal, made by your true friend because

We can never expect our love (spouse) to be a good friend

Friendship provides a lobby towards love

I’ve not loved you till this second, but I know how much it pains you.

Nothing is so impressive except for your guts to express your love.

I TOO LOVE YOU.”

 

He started to sweat, his heart beat abnormally. He became numb. Everything had come to an end in his life.

 

And that day was “Feb 14” and the letter was the reply to his friend’s proposal written by the girl whom he thought all his future was.

 

Fall in love, but be prepared to face its consequence